Submitted by Deborah Lavery Powers
Staff Reporter
The following are highlights from some of the narrative reports on file at the Fernandina Beach Police Department.
Our Police officers thoroughly investigate every reported incident, even when the Reporting Individual has a history of calling in thefts and burglaries that eventually — or almost immediately — prove to be “unfounded.” Our Reporting Individual’s “burglary” of this week was no different. It was found to be “unfounded,” too.. But, no matter. Maybe one day she will be calling about a real theft or burglary. And our Police officers will be right there to serve her — as they are every time she calls. Our Reporting Individual has been “Baker Acted” multiple times. Being “Baker Acted” means that there is evidence available that the individual in question has a mental illness and is a “harm to self, harm to others, or self neglectful.”
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It isn’t only our young people who illegally drink beer on the beach accesses. This week a 40 year old female was carrying an open can of beer on the access near Sliders.
$75.00.
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Only at Shrimp Fest — because when else are there closed tents lining Centre Street at 8 p.m.? Allegedly Drunk Teen unzipped one of the tents and went inside — with Police right behind him — because he was trespassing and who knows, he might have burglary in mind. He didn’t. He, instead, wanted privacy when he urinated!
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Hullo out there! GPS tracking can help locate a phone that suddenly goes missing from an Employee’s Workstation — maybe not when the phone is still in the same “dead spot” as the workstation — but when the phone takes a “walk” outside to the parking lot where there is a signal, voila!, there it is!
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This Problem moved itself from inside the bar to the sidewalk outside by the time Police arrived. The Problem was actually two women who needed to be “separated.” Number One and her party were sitting at a table inside when Number Two tried to “commandeer” the table. There was alleged spitting (but no evidence of spittle on the supposed victim’s clothing) but there was redness under the eye of the one who claimed she was punched in the face by the other. The alleged Puncher was taken into custody.
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Twenty-Three-Year-Old was traveling down the street on his skateboard while “attaching himself” to the back of a moving vehicle. $75.00. And lucky!
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A sealed envelop containing confidential personnel information was mailed from Fernandina Beach, but there were no contents inside when it arrived at its destination. Sender has requested a USPS investigation be undertaken.
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Victim never left town, but his debit card was used by somebody in China to make three purchases in Texas — one of them noted as being a “US Birth Certificate.” Victim’s bank is arranging reimbursement of the debited $136.50.
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At approximately 1:00 a.m., Police observed Driver drinking beer in a parking lot — and then throwing the beer bottle out of her car before driving off down the street. Driver wanted to be honest and admitted to feeling a little “buzz” — maybe a 6,7, or 8 on a scale of 10? “0” is sober. She provided two breath samples: .182 and .185. (.08 is considered legally intoxicated.)
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The two word note on the car certainly made it appear that Criminal Mischief Maker has little regard for Victim — and apparently doesn’t mind saying so in words not fit to print. Criminal Mischief Maker went one step further — and apparently chipped the windshield of Victim’s car — and also apparently made a long scratch on the passenger’s side of the car. Victim thinks she knows the culprit – her Ex.
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There were investigative leads and video footage that helped City Police and Nassau Deputies locate Owner’s weed trimmer, “valued at $400.” It had been stolen from the back of his truck. Thief admitted to stealing the weed trimmer and then selling it for $50 — but he wouldn’t ‘fess up to whom he had sold it. He told his aunt, instead, and she arranged to have Purchaser return it. Thief is charged with Grand Theft and Dealing in Stolen Property..
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The short story is that 98 Oxycontin (325 mg) are missing. The long story involves a handful of relatives in and out of the unlocked house during the hours of possible robbery — and a housemate sleeping through the whole adventure. And where were the pills kept? Hidden under Pill Owner’s mattress.
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Editor’s Note: After a career in adult education, where writing, course design and development were her “beat”, Deborah now enjoys the world of freelancing, and volunteering. Deborah covers the police beat for the Fernandina Observer writing weekly “Police blotter blasts . . .” We thank Deborah for her many contributions.
May 16, 2013 10:33 p.m.